21 07 2009

The latest story about two bisexual dudes who like to dress up as Furries and plot to kill one’s parents while dreaming of having their cocks bitten off brought to you courtesy of the Lancashire Evening Post in the UK:

Christopher Monks, 24, wanted Shaun Skarnes to murder his parents Christopher and Elizabeth Monks while they slept and then perform an extreme sex act on him, Preston Crown Court was told.

The bisexual pair are alleged to have hatched the plot after meeting on an internet site about “Furries” – people who pretend to be animal characters and share sexual role-playing fantasies.

Prosecutor Dennis Watson QC told the court that while Skarnes carried out the attack, ex-Runshaw College student Monks stayed downstairs, deleting “incriminating” text messages.

Mr Watson said Monks had talked about his sexual desire for his penis to be bitten off in online chatroom discussions.

He told the jury: “It may seem extreme that he wanted his penis bitten off, but there is ample evidence from websites he visited and conversations with Shaun Skarnes that this was a deeply held interest and one he found sexually stimulating.

Dude, what the fuck!? Overlooking the bisexual “Furriness” of this story and pushing past the fact that this kid wanted to murder his adoptive parents, let’s get right to the real point: why in the hell would you want some dude to bite your dick off? Please, somebody feel free to comment on this post and take a shot at explaining this one to me, because I am completely lost. You want to get dressed up like a gopher and beat off onto another guy dressed like a squirrel – hey, that’s great. Good for you…definitely a little fucked up…but good for you. You want to have your parents killed – again, fucked up and probably not the best route to take – but it’s been done before. Now, you want to have your manmeat bitten off as part of a sexual fantasy??? That’s just plain fucking weird and you need some help…but lucky for you, Randy will oblige!

Boats N Hoes! Carwash style

20 07 2009

Because yesterday was just a gorgeous day on the beach…and such a beautiful day to be outside washing the ride!

Holy Miranda Kerr!

20 07 2009

Okay – so I know everyone is still drooling over Marisa Miller from last night’s 2009 ESPYs airing (and rightfully so), but I have to say…Miranda Kerr is fucking hot! This Australian supermodel and Victoria Secrets girl just plain does it for me. Check her out…

The French are finally good for something

20 07 2009













Son of a bitch! Why didn’t I come up with this? A door that flips into an insta-Beer Pong table? Fuck! And of all people some French dude comes up with this jackpot money-maker. Soon every college dorm room this side of the Atlantic will come equipped with one and this guy will be retired with 40 hot bitches on his mega yacht while I’m still wanking it to Boats N Hoes! pictures. Let me reiterate…SON OF A BITCH!

God, Guns, Guts & American Pick-up Trucks

17 07 2009

I bet you right after this interview Mark went home and threw in a huge pinch of skoal, smacked his kid up, fucked his wife while smoking a butt, took a shot of Evan Williams, drank 16 beers and fell asleep wrapped in his Confederate flag — but hey, it’s just a guess.

Leave a comment and let us know what you think – is Mark Muller a crazy son of a bitch or the gem of America?

*Special thanks to Big Daddy Dom for the video submission*

Boats N Hoes! Emmy Nomination Style

17 07 2009

Since the 2009 Emmy Nominations came out yesterday, I thought I would dedicate Friday’s Boats N Hoes! segment to the lovely nominees. I also want to apolgize for the slow blog activity this week as AngryFist is out on vacation, but we should have our act together by Monday. Enjoy the weekend!

P.S. If you want a full list of the nominees, click here.

Send us your ideas!

17 07 2009

Email us your story ideas, Boats N Hoes! suggestions, feedback, anything – we want to hear it! We’d also love to put together a Boats N Hoes! Local segment, so send us hot chicks from your city! Click below…

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